#TeacherProblems - Volume 1

Tuesday, February 17, 2015

I'm in my ninth year of teaching (I know, I'm in disbelief as well) and every year that rolls by my friends and I talk about how we should write a book with the things that happen in our career.  I'm talking the good, the bad and the absolutely absurd and cray cray.  With this in mind, I have decided to start a post appropriately titled - #TeacherProblems.   Obvi there will be multiple volumes, but we will start with Volume 1 today.

Here are some of my favs from the past and present.


After my first year of teaching, my district decided to close our school and we were all shipped to different elementaries within the system.  This was also my first year as a "Mrs." but after the class I had the previous year, I deserved this amazing group of sweet little first graders.  Probably one of my favorite groups of firsties to date.
Daniel - "Mrs. Baumgartner, my name isn't Daniel anymore."
Me - "It's not?  When did I miss this?"
Daniel - "It's Indiana Jones.  Can you please change my name tag?"

He also insisted on writing Indiana Jones on his paper until I insisted that if he chose to write Indiana Jones, he also had to include his real hyphenated last name.  It was too long and therefore Indiana Jones did not last.

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We had spent almost a good week reading and learning about Helen Keller.  This was my reading assessment about the story.  Please note, students could even USE THE BOOK.

#teacherfail

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The following quotes are from the same student.  We will refer to him as Buddy.
Buddy - "Mrs. Baumgartner, my mom has no teeth."
Me - (imagine the look of shock on my face as I say this) - "Umm, what?"
Buddy - "Yeah, the dentist took them all out.  She's getting new ones next week."
People.  I can't make this up.  

Buddy - "Sorry my Daily Math isn't done.  I was taking a dump."
Thanks?
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Every year on the 100th Day of School I love to have students write about themselves when they are 100.  This year I had some amazing pieces including dancing with canes, playing Bingo and this one, about after life nonetheless:


If you are this clever when you are dead you will be the leader of the pack my friend.  Seriously.  Best response ever.
  Just don't come back after me please.


This is just a small portion of what I have experienced in my teaching career.  Be ready for Volume 2.  I'm sure it will only get better from here.

xo,





17 comments:

  1. You must get so many smiles out of the funny things they say and do every day!

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  2. Well no doubt there are plenty of reasons for you to smile exuberantly throughout the day...as well as the relief of Friday's and a weekend off!

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  3. Hahaha. I'll be the walking dead. Too funny.

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  4. I love reading your blog! I seriosuly laugh out loud. I must admit..for about 30 seconds I wish I was a teacher just for these funny moments - then I wake up :)

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  5. I love reading your blog! I seriosuly laugh out loud. I must admit..for about 30 seconds I wish I was a teacher just for these funny moments - then I wake up :)

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  6. I'm sure you get a lot of this! I love hearing stories from my daughter's teacher.

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  7. That walking dead writing is perfect! I would get such a kick out of hearing all of the kids' fun ideas.

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  8. Oh my gosh, Indiana Jones! Hahahaha! He wanted his nametag changed! Hahahaha! LOVE IT!

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  9. Ha! Love this, kids are hilarious and such a joy to watch.

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  10. Oh, my! Yes, I do miss those crazy moments of teaching. The things kids say... I can only imagine what gems my children have told their own teachers. Better yet, I don't want to know.

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  11. I have a degree in Education and did a lot of subbing (never actually taught - long story), but during my student teaching and subbing I saw/heard some of the funniest/craziest things. :) It is one of the reasons that after I had my son I try to be very careful what I say/do (unless I don't care for others knowing) because kids will tell it. :-D

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  12. Kids can be so crazy! I dealt with this as I homeschooled my daughter but I can only imagine the fun you've had with 20-30 kids each year!

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  13. Kids are so brutally honest! My daughter is 6 and the things she comes up with just blow my mind! At least she hasn't changed her name, yet!

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  14. Indiana Jones & brain-eating zombies for the win! HAHA so funny!

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  15. hahaha I can't wait to read Vol 2! these are such keepers!

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  16. Too funny!! Maybe the Helen Keller girl was writing about how she wished the story would have ended, lol!

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  17. Hehehehehehehehe I am about ready to look for a position again just reading this as it reminds me of the stories I'd LOVE to add to your book!

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